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Loretta was looking for a laugh.
She crept slowly up to her three-month-old son, smiling and whispering,
"I’m going to get you," until they were nose to nose. Then,
she tickled him. He cried.
Mom was mortified. The same game won giggles when Loretta’s neighbor
played it with her 10-month-old daughter. Why didn’t it work for Loretta?
The difference in the age of the two babies may be one reason. What provokes
a laugh in a 10-month-old, may scare the diaper off a two-month-old. Babies
also are different from one to the next. One doesn’t always laugh at the same
kinds of games that other babies find riotous.
Also, as Loretta discovered, a fine line separates laughing from crying.
One theory is that smiling and laughter in babies occur when tension is built
slowly, then suddenly released. The greater the tension and more sudden the
release, the better chance of getting some giggles. But the result may be the
opposite if there is too much tension or if it builds up too quickly.
What is too much or too fast will change as the baby grows older. As babies
develop, the type of play that makes them laugh tends to change from vigorous
stimulation to more subtle, social games. For 7- to 10-month old babies, the
simple act of Mom shaking her hair in the baby’s face is one of the more
sure-fire laugh-getters. Playing games with your baby is important. It
helps you get to know each other and have fun together. Experiment to see
what works..
Practice building excitement slowly, then releasing it. Do something over and
over again, and then change it.
Peek-a-boo is a standard. Hold up a handkerchief or other object that hides
your face from your baby. Then lean around the handkerchief to the right and
say, "peek-a-boo." Slight changes on a familiar routine can also be
entertaining. After peeking around the right side of the handkerchief several
times, peek out from the left side. With an older infant, get close enough
with the handkerchief and don’t peek at all. Will your baby reach to pull the
cloth away to find you? Then say, "peek-a-boo."
You may accidentally go too far too fast. Comfort your baby and stop for
awhile. Return later to the tried and true. It’s all part of getting to know
and love each other.
This column is written by Robert B. McCall, Co-Director of the
Office of Child Development and Professor of Psychology, and is provided as a
public service by the Frank and Theresa Caplan Fund for Early Childhood Development
and Parenting Education.